2013

I am sorry I started this post with a meme but this was calling out to me

So 2012 is now past us, truthfully, although some great things happened last year, I am glad it's now over. It was a strange year for me, a lot of the bad was balanced by the good, but my 2012 started out with a lot of negativity and I don't think I fully recovered for a large part of the year. I am feeling a lot better now than I did this time last year and I am looking forward to 2013 with some hope and a plan.

I never make resolutions, I think if you want to change something in life, you should do it, regardless what time of the year it happens to be. Instead of resolutions, I have plans for the year, and maybe some small changes that I want to keep, course, some of them will be the stereotypical resolution, health wise but they're needed I guess.

Firstly is I hope to be working by the end of this year. I am in desperate need to work, not for the income but mainly just to be contributing to society and my self esteem. I think a large part of my anxiety will improve once I start working. It might become worse but I will feel so much better once I am in a stable working environment.

Over the past 2 years my Film work has become none existent.Which is a shame, it was something I was very passionate about. I felt like it was my true calling. In many ways, it felt that media and filming as a whole was the only thing I was remotely good at. It was one of the few things in this world I understand to some degree. I lost the urge to be in the field largely due to my depression and mood swings and over the past two years I have just lost the will to do anything related to filming or writing. Lately I have been wanting to go back to college, finish my pre degree. It's still to early to see how this will turn out in the end but I would still one day like to go to University. I should have been there already if I hadn't have given into the pressure and stress. I would like to start writing small films in my spare time. I am looking forward to starting a new you tube channel and starting to film again. I really should start up Rising Kite Films.

I really should start finishing what I start. I have a tendency to lose interest in books and video games. TV shows have been keeping my attention lately which is odd. Because I used to be the same with those to. I have a small pile of books and video games I need to work through before I pick up anything else. It will be  nice to start using the library again.

Finally I am starting to cut down on the amount of caffeinated coffee I drink. I really need to start drinking more water and start replacing my coffee with decaf. It wouldn't hurt to start eating a little more healthy as well. I want to research this before I dive straight in and eat nothing but fruit, I want to watch what I eat but I want to keep it balanced at the same time. I think my body and immune system will thank me in the long run. It cant hurt to drop a little weight either.

I think 2013 will be a better year that last. But as always it's not enough to hope for change, you have to work hard and earn the change, I just hope I have the willpower to work hard and bring the changes I desire this year.